Unique Ink Press
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The Sisyphus Solution is scheduled for release early this year. It is an autobiographical account of my nearly lifelong attempt to solve an unsolvable problem. I struggle to find the reason why persons like myself are so unwilling to accept unanswered questions, while others so easily move on. I believe there is something in our nature that tends toward a desire to find order in life, even in the midst of chaos. The object of my obsession was a geometry problem, one of three classical unsolved problems, the trisection of an angle. I couldn't have picked a more appropriate symbol to define the dilemmas of my life. We will all ultimately define ourselves by the choices we make. Whether we never stop dreaming or readily abandon the dreams of our youth, we never stop becoming the consequences of our choices.
Here is an excerpt from the beginning of The Sisyphus Solution:
Sisyphus epitomizes the hopelessness of pursuing the solution to an unsolvable problem. That Greek hero is a metaphor for people caught up in an endless cycle of struggling to accomplish an impossible task. Most people realize that a predicament like that of Sisyphus is cursed, being unsolvable by design—a violation of god-ordained law. However, some people, particularly the young or the young at heart, have a temperament that persistently digresses toward skepticism of rules, any rules. Young people are far more likely to be fascinated by unsolvable problems. They are attracted by a force as mysterious as the problem itself. I used to be young.
To people who never to grow up, the warning signs diverting them around troubled stretches on the road of life appear not to read Detour, but simply Rough Road Ahead. Problems are challenges, not roadblocks. To such people warning signs whoosh by in a blur. A painted platter on a post is not going to tell them which way to go. They will blast through that rough stretch of road and get to their destination ahead of everyone else. Rules are for conformists, not individualists. To the young (or immature) rules are meant to be broken. For the old, experience has usually taught the advantages of conformity. Rules have boxed them into conformity. Breaking the rules has broken their will. I feel old.
Most people outgrow the impulsiveness of youth, but some never do. They refuse to learn from past mistakes and continue making foolhardy decisions, trying to fly through life with a Peter Pan plan to never grow up. They seldom question where they are going and never doubt their right to go there. They don’t need a smooth road to reach their destination. It took me a while to begin learning from my mistakes.
Those who refuse to grow up feel compelled to test rules, to verify that boundaries are truly inviolable. They have little or no fear of hurting themselves by ignoring detour signs. They are so emotionally hardheaded they have become spiritually softheaded. They are not concerned about banging their heads, for sometimes the barrier has cracked before the head. Those people believe banging their heads makes their heads harder and their skulls thicker. But I don’t.
However, for most, maturity comes with age; and with maturity, discretion. Most adults usually stop testing the bounds of natural laws, resigning themselves to their own immutability. They have learned to follow signposts rather than challenge them. I tried to never grow up, but I failed.